A special thank you to the guy whose car I hit
And not just because he solves my problem for today about what to write. The blogger’s dirty secret.
There we were, Bear and I, just driving home from a lovely walk in the park with a dear friend of mine, and we were stopped at a light just a few blocks from home, and I reached into the back seat to grab something and Bear was there and where was my head and apparently I let go of the brake just a little and BAM.
The guy in the Pontiac got out, walked around to look at his bumper and me, and I said, “Let’s pull around,” and already I hated what was to come.
But the guy was totally cool. We both looked at the scuff on his bumper–I couldn’t have been going more than two miles an hour–and he said it didn’t look like a big deal, but he took my name and insurance information anyway, “Just in case my bumper falls off in the next day or two,” and for all I know he’s going to claim whiplash or something else even though obviously neither of us was injured, but whatever happens I’m still grateful for how nice he was to me in the moment.
I apologized often. I told him on top of the scuff I was really sorry for the inconvenience–who wants to have to deal with this when you just want to go home?
The only thing I could find to write my information on was an old movie ticket stub. I didn’t even look at it, just flipped it over.
But he looked at it. “Secret Window. Was that any good?”
Not what I was expecting. “Um, yeah, it was okay.”
“That was a few years ago,” he said. “Right? And you’ve kept this that long?”
“Well, not because I’m a big Johnny Depp fan or anything. I’m just a pack rat.”
“What was it about?”
And my brain is going, “Huh? Why aren’t you yelling? Are we supposed to have a regular conversation here?” I was just so nervous.
But I took the time to tell him the plot–compared it to Fight Club in its way, although Fight Club was much, much better.
After a little odd, awkward chit chat, we said our goodbyes, got in our cars, I waited for him to pull out first (didn’t need to run into him again, thank you), then finally relaxed.
Ugh.
It was totally my fault. Simple inattention. I’m glad it wasn’t worse, but I’m trying to absorb the lesson.
Because many years ago–back in the lawyer years–I had something similar happen. I was rushing, not paying attention, rear-ended someone. And it was at a time in my life when everything was a rush, nothing was fun, it was just do it do it do it.
My life isn’t like that anymore. I LOVE my work. I love every part of it. But it doesn’t mean I still don’t rush if I’m not careful.
A few days ago I rode back on the plane with a young woman who told me a fascinating story about her situation. She, too, loves her job–so much so she’ll work until 11:00 every night, no matter what time she begins the day. And she’d been doing that for years, thinking it was all fine, and then a year and a half ago got into a horrible car accident and was in a coma for eleven days.
She couldn’t walk for six months. She’s been recovering slowly since then. And what she realized as part of all that is that no matter how much she loves her work, she has to slow down.
She used to be able to get by on six hours of sleep a night, but after her accident needed nine. For months. Which makes sense, since her body was so overworked doing all that repair.
But beside the need for sleep, she also realized she needed more time in the day to take care of herself. To read, to meditate, do yoga, play her piano.
So she instituted this rule for herself that she wouldn’t start work until ten in the morning. Because she knew she’d always work until eleven at night, whether she started at dawn or at noon. So now she takes those three hours or so every morning to feed her mind and soul, to care for her body, to set this new, slower pace.
I don’t want to have to be in a coma for eleven days to get that. A simple bumper-bump will do. I’ve been pretty busy lately, and it hasn’t bothered me because I love what I do.
But I still have to take time. I still have to slow down. Even though all the work that’s waiting for me is so fulfilling.
So there’s my long Wednesday story for you. The moral: quitcher rushing. Pay attention. Don’t let the dog distract you. Slow down. Be at peace.
Maybe this morning I’ll play my piano.
Technorati Tags: Simplification, Simplify Your Life, Slowing Down, Hope That Guy Decides His Bumper Looks Great And He Never Calls Me
March 28th, 2007 at 7:31 am
The most bizarre part of this entry to me is that you only had an old movie ticket stub to write on? Are you SERIOUS?!?!?!?! You’re a writer! I never go anywhere without a mini-notepad. I mean, Forget my keys, my wallet, you name it. But not my notebook.
March 28th, 2007 at 8:31 am
Oh, for shame. You caught me.
Actually, I handle my random thoughts a different way. I always carry a cell phone with me. That way if I’m out on a walk or driving somewhere and I get some brilliant idea, I call myself and leave a message at home. Sometimes I’ll call myself four times in half an hour. Works for me.
March 28th, 2007 at 9:05 am
Did you give him the blog address?
March 28th, 2007 at 9:06 am
Aack! Of course not! The blog is just for my friends and for people who probably won’t sue me!
March 28th, 2007 at 9:18 am
Promotion, Robin. Everyone is your friend.
March 28th, 2007 at 9:22 am
Robin,
I bestow upon you the award for: “Best Blog Titles that Make You Want to Read Them Right Away.” I mean, between underwear and virginity and car crashes, no other blog has a chance…
A lady bumped into me this week, too. I was pulling out of the school after dropping off my son when I was “tapped” from behind. So I get out, walk around and check the bumper, and then go to the woman’s window to tell her there’s no damage.
She says: “Can you move your car to the right so I can get by?”
She didn’t even know she’d hit me! She thought I had car trouble or something.
So I said: “I’m actually turning left, and you hit me.” Well, then she said, “Oh, sorry.”
No harm done, but believe me, when she pulled out behind me, I kept a good, close eye on her…and she didn’t have a large dog as an excuse!
Oh, and I love your method of taking notes by cell phone. I can’t use it, though, because if I leave a message on the machine when I’m not home, my dog starts to howl…
March 28th, 2007 at 9:54 am
Sara, you’re so sweet. Thanks for liking my blog titles.
That story you getting hit is too weird! Talk about oblivious!
And your dog and the message machine? Makes me feel better about some of Bear’s odd behavior.
March 28th, 2007 at 11:24 am
I’m still chuckling about your method of calling yourself to leave messages-I’ve never thought of doing that, but now I’m going to give it a try! Plus I want to see if any of my dogs are answering the phone when I’m not there-I’ve had my suspicions.
March 28th, 2007 at 11:48 am
You know… I get hit all the time! Seriously, I’m 25 and already on my 4th car! Amazingly, it is never my fault! My insurance company must hate me! Okay, confession… I am still under my parents’ insurance, but my mom told me as soon as I graduate I’m being kicked off. (I wouldn’t be surprised if she brought it up at my graduation!)
Sooooo… anyone know a good place to live that has low insurance rates? I’ve been thinking of relocating (already sent my resume to Colorado, Indiana, and Ohio).
And I agree… enjoy life, people! It goes way too freaking fast!! =)
March 28th, 2007 at 12:40 pm
Yikes, I’m so glad it wasn’t more serious. And I love the “moral of the story” bit. That’s a good reminder for all of us. Thanks!
March 28th, 2007 at 12:54 pm
First off, in response to Diana’s comment, Robin isn’t alone. In seventh grade I carried twenty-two Sharpies in my purse just in case I was caught somewhere without a notebook and needed to make color-coded notes on my arm. (I have whittled that down to one or none, by now.)
This is like something I’ve said before, though - if you need to slow down, your attention WILL be gotten. Somehow.
Thank goodness you and the oddly-nice guy weren’t injured or otherwise severely inconvenienced.
And as for weird accidents with cars…once I was driving with my mother back from the grandparents’, and an approximately road-colored Rubbermaid trash can appeared out of nowhere and attacked us. I kid you not. (No injury, just a scare, thankfully.)
Great post, Robin! (I thought the link to “Do it for the blog!” was especially well-placed.)
March 28th, 2007 at 1:26 pm
Miri, what’s with you and Christen being the innocent bystander drivers and having all these cars/trash cans attacking you? Karma?
March 28th, 2007 at 2:49 pm
Ohhhh… Miri… I once had a tire come flying off the back of a minivan at me at about 65 MPH! I was freaking out! Thank heavens I am an amazing driver and swerved out of the way. No one was hurt and no damage was done. Other than that… I’ve been hit from the back, hit from the side, broken into, and flooded. I’m like Stephanie Plum minus the explosions!
March 28th, 2007 at 8:21 pm
Delightful post, and fun comments. BTW …if said guy had read this blog entry, there is absolutely *no* way he could sue you (assuming he is, as he seems, a decent human being).
March 28th, 2007 at 8:28 pm
Thanks, Damascena!
March 29th, 2007 at 5:48 am
Great Stories.
(Now if the guy was single, and you were single, and there was a call back, you’d have a great book)
I love the titles to. They really grab your attention.
March 29th, 2007 at 8:06 am
“Rear-end”
A story of a hectic girl who gets the message to slow down after rear-ending a nice guy with a great butt.
March 29th, 2007 at 8:24 am
Oh, buh-rother.