Just can’t do the prom dress thing
You guys know I loved Twilight, right?
Well check this out. This Saturday the author of Twilight, Stephenie Meyers, is hosting a full-on prom. I’ve been invited. Take a look at these details.
Notice the part where it’s black tie? See all the pretty pictures of pretty dresses?
Yeah, well I tried.
Somewhere between my girlhood and womanhood I sort of lost my taste for dresses. Part of the reason is that during my years of martial arts training, the question was always drummed into my head: “Can you fight in that?” It made pants my primary choice. Pants and semi-sensible shoes that I can run in. And a good, practical bra.
The only time I’ve been really comfortable going all-out frufru girly is at weddings involving members of my dojo. Because then there are plenty of other people around who can handle the fighting if there’s a rumble of some sort.
I know, it’s kind of weird. Shut up. It’s just how my brain works anymore.
So yesterday I spent several hours trying on all sorts of puffy, swirly, colorful spring dresses, trying to picture myself wearing any of them on Saturday, and also picturing the girly shoes I’d have to buy to go with them, and nope, no way. Just couldn’t bring myself to do it.
So it’s fancy dressy black pants and a fancy dressy white shirt, and either boots or high heels (haven’t decided yet). Oh, and maybe some of those Spanx some of you have been raving about. This seems like a Spanx event.
Just so you know, my other choice was renting this fancy hoop skirt dress I’ve worn to several events over the years. It’s from the “Southern Belle” section of the costume store, and it actually looks really good on me. I’ve worn hoop skirt dresses to lots of special events over the years–New Year’s Eve parties, law school graduation (with red Converse high tops underneath), my wedding. But my husband convinced me that by now I’m sort of past the point where I need to make fun of the fanciness of events–and my lack of the proper clothes for them–by renting costumes. I should be able to dress like myself.
Any opinions on this? I think the hoop skirt dress is probably still available. Or should I stick with my elegant pair of (ninja) pants?
Technorati Tags: Twilight, Stephenie Meyer, Prom Outfits You Can Fight In
First of all… OMG! I am soooooo jealous! I would *love* to go to a prom!!!! I told my future brother in law (who is 17) that he should take me to his… but I guess he didn’t think it was a great idea. =(
Okay, jealousy aside! Put down the poofy dresses! Poofy dresses are for 17 year olds named Tiffany, whose only life dilemna is whether to paint her fake finger nails baby pink or silver! If you seriously want to wear a dress (and I think the hoop skirt sounds hot!), you should find something with nice long lines so that you look really elegant. Do you have any Ann Taylors around you? They’re Celebrations Collection is beautiful! And I love Ann Taylor. The clothes there have a perfect fit for most! I, obviously, do not know your body type… but maybe something like this http://tinyurl.com/yrfvzx or this http://tinyurl.com/yuj2kk ?
Oh, or you could always wear a tux! Women wearing tuxes are kind of sexy… and you could probably fight in it! =)
(P.S. I love to dress other people. Sorry if I’m being a PITA!)
Christen, those dresses you linked to are gorgeous. But look at all the fabric I’d have to clear away before I could get in a good roundhouse kick. So no, I’ll have to keep looking. But thank you for your ideas–you’re obviously quite the fashionista.
So, Robin, I’m guessing that if you ever got remarried you wouldn’t want a dress like this??? http://tinyurl.com/2wv7h3
Okay, I hate ever admitting that I’m jealous of anything…but OM freaking G!
I want to go to a Twilight Prom. And I also want to learn how to kick butt.
I need to live by you.
I also am soooo jealous about the prom! I spend my days in either a suit or kid/horse/dog suitable clothing and I so love to do the dressy party black-tie thing. And what could be hotter than a woman in a fancy dress kickin’ a**? Hike that skirt up and send em’ flyin’! With your beautiful La Purla undies underneath of course.
You don’t get to do it that often, so I say when you have an opportunity to dazzle dress – do it! I’ve got a few ball gowns you’re welcome to borrow! Seriously, you can, I’ve got them all out to pack. I also think tuxedos are hot on women-whether dress or pant style. Black is always terrific. Pants to black-tie have got to be elegant and your white fancy blouse will make it special-good choices there. I’m not much of a high heel person myself, and there are tons of fancy flats out there-maybe something in patent leather? Nice little clutch or small purse-one with a little pizzaz (sp?) to break-up the black (got those too). Let’s do hair now….We could have a dress-Robin-up-party, oh, this post is too much fun…darn,I’ve got to stop, pull on my horsesh@@ covered boots and get kids to barn and school.
Wait – one more VIP thing:
No matter what you wear, wear it with ATTITUDE! It’s the best accessory.
I wish you could all come to the prom with me. I’m not sure how many grown ups will be there–I have the feeling it will be mostly teen girls with a few teen boys who like their odds–and it would be great to hang with all of you prom-deprived women.
Christen, that wedding dress is TOTALLY the kind of thing I like to wear. Change it to black and I’d wear it this weekend.
Deborah, thanks for the offer, but from all the things Annette has said, I’m guessing you and I are very different sizes. But thanks for the other input. And Roger that on the attitude.
Heather, next time I’m in your state we’ll schedule a ninja lesson.
Have you ever seen Buffy the Vampire Slayer? The movie, not the show. You need tearaway dress like Buffy! So you can look all princess-y and then rip off your skirt to kick some butt!
Yup, Molly, that’s what I was thinking too.
However, as a woman who has in her life worn all of the following: a full men’s tux; slinky pants with a kick-ass hip-slung belt and a red silk top; a silver short number with long black gloves and thigh-high glittery hose, a dark purple velvet gown with vintage drippy earrings, and a muscle-baring sheath with my hair slicked back a la The Matrix, I say:
Whatever you wear, have fun! That’s what “dressing up” IS. Remind me to send you a picture of me in my punk Halloween costume. That’s what I’d wear to the Prom. If I were invited, that is…
And buy your frou-frou purse at Target. They have the best. And they are so cheap that if you wind up bashing someone with it, no big loss.
BTW, if I ever become famous, will you be my bodyguard?
Sara, I’m impressed! That’s quite a lineup of outfits. You’re obviously one of those women who can wear anything and look great in it.
Molly, it’s been years since I saw Buffy the movie. A tear-away dress could be just the thing. Thanks!
Well, there was the unfortunate white lace granny dress I wore to my actual first prom. Didn’t look so great in that. And the tube top I wore to be Cher at a 70’s party. Not a good idea for someone as flat-chested as me. Plus the dangly Indian earrings kept ripping hair from the long black wig every time I tried to sing Half-Breed. Not pretty.
I guess my point was: dress how you want to FEEL. If flowy pants and a snappy white blouse make you feel like you’re all that, them wear ‘em. Like, OMG, Katherine Hepburn could wear the pants.
Just don’t go more conservative than you actually are. I did that once (see above mentioned first prom) and all I got out of it was a bad French kiss.
Ha!
Oh, wear the high heels with the pants! If you have to protect yourself with a high kick maneauver, you’ll not only look quite elegant, but you’ll have a great chance of stilettoing the person’s eye out. Or at least doing some serious damage.
As for the top, I’d suggest some slinky low cut number. This way you can power up the Distract, Kick Butt kick with effortless style and grace.
Have fun and report back!
Vivian, good call on the slinky top. I’m not quite satisfied with what I bought yesterday, so I’m about to head out again.
Yes, folks, this is all in the name of my writing career. Because if you’re going to Stephenie Meyer’s book-related prom (it’s the early launch party for her upcoming release of Eclipse, the third book in the series), then you need to have the proper attire.
In other words, I do these fun things not because I want to, of course, but because I must.
Is my story to the IRS.
Um, just kidding about the IRS thing.
Robin, I say this with all due respect: suck it up and buy a dress. It’s a PROM. Stephenie is wearing something “worthy of a coronation.” You should wear a dress. There are a TON of party dresses, sundresses, you name them dresses out right now.
Get one with a full skirt (if you don’t like poofy, you can get something that is chiffon so it is full but still drapes) and you can roundhouse kick ’til they send the band home. I’d be more likely to be able to fight in a dress an a pair of sensible shoes than in pants and high heels.
http://www.amazon.com/Satin-Halter-Crystal-Formal-Bridesmaid/dp/B000KJNJH2/ref=sr_1_1/104-8805257-0290310?ie=UTF8&s=apparel&qid=1178171802&sr=1-1
I wonder if they do overnight delivery?
Diana, I honestly tried again just a while ago, but no could do. And that dress you linked to is pretty, but you don’t understand my shape. You and I are . . . different.
But I appreciate your tough love approach to all this. I’m always due for some “suck it up.”
Robin – If you’re going to wear pants, the best thing to do is bring a date in a dress.
Hold on while I check my calendar…
Patrick, you’re on. Forget coming to my book launch party–use your plane ticket for this.
If Patrick wears the dress and the thong underneath it, I’ll give him the air ticket.
Oo, Patrick, please, please, please?
Robin – Let’s be clear. Diana and I are…different.
I’m commando when wearing dresses.
little late on the “weigh-in”, though not as late as sara. haven’t read “all” the posts but have to throw in with deborah here. get thee to your nearest thrift store; buy thee anything that approximates christen’s “wedding dress” (in a pastel hue); have thy hair done up texas-big; add a wrist corsage and you are set. in the event that your husband balks at accentuating your obvious irresitable charms–dump his ass and invite , WHO??? humm, yeah that’s right patrick–even if it means purchasing a plane ticket and his own wrist corsage.
the blog (get behing me here bloggies) DEMANDS photographic evidence of your compliance. and please thank “twilight” writer lady or whoever she is for inviting all of us.
Robin, I agree with Annette, suck it up the event lasts only a few hours and why be a ’standout’ at a fellow author’s event? You can do it!! If you have to be a rebel, do it quietly with men’s underwear or something unseen by the public eye.
This is not a day you will have to protect yourself or anyone else in the room—put the ‘flipping someone over your shoulder’ out of your mind. Be a lady, just for a short time. Yes, pictures are a must for your blog!!
Sigh. Do NOT gang up with Annette. She does not need the encouragement.
Update: Okay, all you dress bullies, you can all relax. The fancy dress has been purchased, along with the fancy purse, the fancy shawl, the cheapo earrings, necklace, and matching bracelet.
And I tested the outfit by kicking a mannequin in the gut, so I think we’re okay.
I love the hoop-skirt idea, but you’ve got to be careful. Remember what happened to Slue-Foot Sue when she got married to Pecos Bill? Slue-Foot Sue was a cowgirl, but her mama made her wear hoopskirts. Well, when Slue-Foot Sue insisted upon riding Pecos Bill’s horse, that horse tossed her so high that she started bouncing and bouncing. She bounced for three days until Pecos Bill finally lassooed her. Slue-Foot Sue decided that marriage wasn’t for her after all. It broke Pecos Bill’s heart. I blame the hoop skirts.