Once again I am not a vegan
You know it’s not going to work when at the end of every day you’re having to tell yourself, “Well, tomorrow then, okay?” Tomorrow we won’t do the milk in the coffee, the yogurt at lunch, the cheese in the bean burro.
Look, I have no problem being a vegetarian. I might miss my turkey sandwich every now and then, but overall I feel really comfortable giving up meat. But dairy feels like love. Dairy is something the little girl in me remembers too fondly–all those after school cookies and milk moments–to say goodbye to forever.
I’m drawing a different line. Milk and eggs from happy frolicking farm animals. Nothing from commercial farms where the animals are penned in their whole lives, stacked body-to-body on top of each other. I’ll keep buying my goat cheese and eggs from the local farmer who supplies produce every week to the community supported agriculture program I subscribe to. (With a CSA program, you pay a set fee every 12 or so weeks, and for that you get to have a certain share of the farmer’s crop each week–6 potatoes, 2 onions, 2 ears of corn, etc. I’m now in my second subscription period, and I really love it.)
So why do I keep telling myself I need to go vegan? Philosophically I agree with the principle of causing no harm to animals. Theoretically I’d love to live on nothing but plants. But realistically I can’t do it. My body feels too weak–mainly because I don’t go to the trouble of cooking with enough protein substitutes like seitan and tempeh–and I end up obsessing WAY too much about every single morsel I’m “allowed” to put in my mouth. I’m trying to get to the point in my life where I don’t have to think so much about all the little details like what I just ate and what I’m going to eat next. I’m really good at obsession, and that’s not necessarily a positive thing.
When I was in New York last week I had dinner with a dear friend of mine who is a very committed vegan. She simply cannot bear the thought of eating animals or wearing clothes made of their hides. And she and her husband have made the effort to learn to cook for themselves, making sure they always have balanced nutrition. I admire her for everything she’s doing. I’ve tried to be more like her. But the time has finally come to admit to myself that it’s never going to happen.
I’m just curious if anyone else out there has tried to make a radical change–maybe from omnivore to vegetarian, or all the way to vegan, or, like another friend of mine, becoming kosher in her adult years–and had to back off of that because it just wasn’t working. It’s hard when your heart is in it, but it just doesn’t feel right for your body.
Meanwhile, it’s organic milk in my oatmeal for me.
Technorati Tags: Not Vegan But I Tried
Well, nothing that extreme, but I have tried to quit chocolate. Obviously my heart isn’t in it, because even the thought of chocolate-covered mussels can’t keep me from craving chocolate. I admit it, I don’t want to give it up! It keeps me sane.
I would definitely be able to make it as a vegetarian, as I’m one of those for whom meat is a small side to the meal rather than the main dish. But it’s my husband, who may as well be a carnivore, who expects meat to take center stage with a handful of vegetables he can stomach and a heavy dose of starches. He did order The Omnivore’s Dilemma, though, so maybe that will at least stir his thoughts in a healthier direction.
Veganism, while I respect it, is definitely not for me.
I’ve been pesco-vegetarian for years and years, but I can’t give up that fish. There are days when a really steaky piece of fish is what my body yearns and yearns for. It’s either that or retiring to the chaise with a cool cloth on my head.
Y’know what I have quit, though? Caffeine. Can you believe it? I love it so much but it was making me feel so bad. So we broke up. Which makes me feel like a grown up and seems to legitimize me spending lots of money on decaf chai and bottles of kombucha.
We can still be sisters, right?
I’ve allowed myself some dairy because after three days vegan, I’ve lost a little over two pounds. That is too fast and not healthy.
I don’t have any idea what I’m going to do, but I’m not a vegan. I’m a Heather, and all I’m trying to do is eat a kind, healthy diet.
I have walked away from soda, because it was like heroine for me. My only caffeine is from green tea and the occasional black tea. I’m walking away from coffee, because as much as I love it, even the acidity of the decaf kills my stomach.
I’m probably never going to go vegan, and I’m fine with that. If everyone were vegan, cows and chickens would be extinct.
The few times I’ve tried to go vegetarian cold turkey, it never works. So what I’m trying to do now is reduce the amount of meat in my diet. Instead of having meat every day, I’m trying to have it only two or three days a week. Etc. Eat vegetarian at home and then, if we go out to dinner, have meat there. Like sushi. I love sushi.
I love sushi, too.
Diana, that sounds pretty sensible. And I’m with you and Heather and Liz on the fish part–somehow that’s in a different category than mammals. Yes, fish still have a face and fish still feel pain, but I don’t feel as strongly about eating that as I do beef or chicken.
Kelley, I’ve given up chocolate completely for as long as 8 or 9 months (which is when I changed my banner above to “former chocolate addict”), but now I like to have a little now and then. It’s when I get back to needing it daily that I have to pull up and take a long break. But giving it up entirely just didn’t seem like a good life to me.
And by the way, my husband, who is a hunter and a total meat-eater, is like yours, Kelley–couldn’t imagine going a day without some sort of meat.
Liz, I am so impressed that you gave up caffeine! That seems impossible to me. I’ve cut way, way down, but letting go of that first cup in the morning (and sometimes the cup of Starbucks decaf a few hours later) just seemed like too much loss of pleasure. But I agree with both you and Heather that it’s probably better to go without. I applaud you guys, but I’ll have to admire from afar.
As a former Catholic, I have to say: this is what Lent is for. Seeing whether you can live without something, making sure it’s not the most important thing in your life, that it’s not covering up some little anxiety or pain that could be dealt with better by simply confronting it. But then, after Easter, you choose to continue or not, based on what you found out. Maybe the same level, maybe less or more. It’s like an emptying. It’s not meant to be forever; it’s to help you see things more clearly.
Why not go vegan for a week, KNOWING you’re going to stop the next week? What’s so wrong with being cyclical in our eating habits? Accepting that we’re cyclical? That our need for certain food items fluctuates with the season and the day, and yes, our emotional state.
Sara, you’re always so gentle and reasonable. I need to be more like you. Would you come live inside my brain for a while?
Oh! It’s Psychic Monday at Robin’s blog. Food is on my mind so, so, so much lately. I have cut way back on meat like pork and beef, although I still eat it if it’s very important to me (a hot dog at the Hollywood Bowl) or if it’s super-high quality and I’m craving it (which honestly hasn’t happened in two or three months). I thought about organic dairy and eggs and I’m willing to give it a try. I was reading “Skinny B!tch” and, while I was annoyed by the too-too language, I was stopped in my tracks when they pointed out that milk is something you are supposed to consume during a period of life when you double, triple, octuple your body weight.
I can’t give up cheese, though. I enjoy it too much. But I can buy gourmet cheese instead of cheapo cheese. And, like you, I don’t want to obsess over everything I eat. So I’ll just shoot for happy chickens and happy cows and let it go from there.
I’m gentle and reasonable when I’ve been given my chocolate milk-laced coffee, worked off my anxieties by sweating, been fed my lunch of something crunchy/salty, and have had my nap.
There is no way I could give up cheese. It’s what I eat now that I’ve cut back on the beef/pork/chicken at home.
I’ve tried to stop eating pork full stop, actually, which would be okay except for barbecue.
Speaking of, if anyone wants to send me any good beany recipes, I’ve just about exhausted my taste for black bean soup.
(Strangely, I will never exhaust my taste for pasta and marinara. Is that weird of me or just Italian of me?)
Once you Vegan once, I think that’s it. That’s my opinion though.
I’d heard of second veganity, but never really thought people did it. Or at least thought hte people were just lying to themselves…
Well I’m a vegetarian too actually! I have been my whole life though so I don’t miss having meat or anything. I don’t drink normale milk just bc I never have liked the taist I don’t mind it in other stuff /too/ much though, I do eat chesse because like you I LOVE it we eat it like every day. I’ve never though about going vegan. I probably could but it would be REALLY hard, and I guess I don’t mind the milk and chesse so much because it’s not like made of there bodys really, I’m not sure how to describe what it is insted but I guess they don’t kill them for it so it doesn’t bother me to much. But my parents went vegitarien when they were teenagers and I think they miss meat sometimes but it kind of grosses us all out exept my sister who had never had meat in her life and ecided she like bacon, which she does eat somtimes but she’s more diffrent from us though so it’s kind of to be expected. But we love her anyways!
Diana, is it soup weather where you are yet? If so, I have an excellent barley and lentil soup that you won’t get sick of for a while. Let me know and I’ll e-mail it to you.
Dylan, I like that you’re willing to love your sister even though she’s different from you! Ha! That’s cool that your parents went vegetarian so long ago. That really does make it easier for you.
Patrick, believe. This is my third veganity. And I didn’t even have to go to the doctor.
Katie, yes! Welcome to Psychic Monday! I like your policy of cutting back on meat unless it’s really important to you, like the hot dog at the Hollywood Bowl. Food association is very important to a happy life. I must have my mom’s homemade cinnamon rolls for Thanksgiving. Etc.
I’ve heard that about milk, too–that it’s just for growing big fat calves (both the baby cow kind and the fat leg kind). But still, what would childhood and adulthood be without the occasional Oreos and milk? Come on–we’re meant to live these lives, not just suffer.
does guinea pig count as pork?
I’m hungry.
Me too, Barry, now that you mention it.
Speaking of Oreos, has anyone seen that ridiculous commercial for the Dominos Oreo Dessert Pizza? What were they thinking? Can you imagine pigging out on a few greasy slices of cheese pizza (going with the no-meat theme here) only to follow it with Oreo pizza?
@kelley, you are so right, that commercial is creepy on so many levels, and i never even thought about the cheese pizza predecesor–ugh!
Sara, it’s ALWAYS soup weather at my house. I love soup, second only to pasta. I love the idea of “bowl” foods — a whole meal, right there in your bowl.
Kelley, that commercial creeps me out to no end, I’ve never seen a food advertised that looks so disgusting. My partner’s family actually changes the channel when it comes on. And I actually love oreos! (And oreo ice cream).
Diana, that was my soup offer (although I’m sure Sara has some soup recipes, too). I’ll send it to you later.
You guys, I have not seen that commercial you’re talking about. Now I’m so curious! And also pre-disgusted!
Heather, I meant to say earlier how much I appreciate the sanity of your statement: “I’m not a vegan. I’m a Heather, and all I’m trying to do is eat a kind, healthy diet.” Applause, applause. And I’m so impressed you walked away from coffee. You are very strong.
Annette, gahross.
My diet is mean and unhealthy.
I am a vegetarian. I am not a vegan. I don’t eat meat or seafood in any form. I like soymilk. I don’t drink coffee or soda. I don’t have caffeine. I love bread and cheese. I mostly eat rice, pasta, salads, sandwiches, fruit, veggies, etc.
Little Willow, thanks for chiming in. You now get to be my authority. I’d love to live on exactly the things you listed–especially bread, cheese, and fruit. It’s good to know someone who’s doing that.
Patrick, that explains a lot.
Link for the disgusting commercial. Because you know you want to see it. http://youtube.com/watch?v=UkEc67m_jvM
Hey there…just found your blog. I’m a vegan and I love it! When I started I planned on slowly transitioning, but ended up going cold turkey. I guess it’s easy because I’m at a point where “I know too much” and everything grosses me out (guess I spent too much time at the PETA website). LOL. Veganism is not for everybody, though. It can be hard sometimes but if you’re committed, very rewarding.
Robin, I was a vegetarian for four years. I stopped being a vegetarian when I decided that I wanted it not to be an issue when I went over to someone’s house– I just wanted to eat what they offered without having to feel I had to supplement with some vegetarian dish. As someone who doesn’t absorb iron very well, I suspect part of the reason I was grouchy for four years was because I didn’t allow myself a little red meat every now and again. When it comes to cooking for other people or bringing things to potlucks, my offerings are often vegan just to be able to reach the widest range of people. (Raw foodies are out of luck with me).
There are a lot of issues with soy now that we didn’t know about when I was in college. I’ve read that soy should be consumed in small quantities in the form of tempeh and miso (i.e. fermented), and that eating soy as a protein substitute is harmful. Gack! There has got to be a word, German or otherwise, that translates to, “Angst over the realization that everything one eats is somehow poisoned.”
I like milk in my coffee and homemade yogurt on a regular basis. Almond milk is quite nice in cereal, and that’s one of my concessions to dairy substitutes. I am dead-set against hydrogenated foods, and it’s interesting to note that my college roommate became vegan and started feeding me tons of things with hydrogenated fats, all in the name of health and doing no harm to animals.
I can relate to all of Alkelda’s comments, particularly about eating with others. I became vegan years ago while going through a complete health overhaul. I was becoming healthier, and learning a lot, and happened to read Jon Robbins book “May All Be Fed.” After I read it, I just could not eat any dairy or meat. That was it. I was vegan for a few years until one night late in my first pregnancy. I couldn’t even remember how to cook meat, and I was craving it so much that I called my mom and begged her to cook some for me. That was the beginning of the end. After years of being hassled about it, and surrounded by meat-eaters, it was just easier to go along with whatever others were eating. I bought the free-range, chemical-free meats, eggs & dairy and felt better about that. Recently I’ve tried to go back to it, and for the past two months I haven’t eaten meat, just fish and dairy. There are a lot of great meat substitutes and I don’t miss anything, so as long as it works with my life I’m sticking with it, even if some people around me are annoyed. My original plan was to be vegan again but it is just too limiting for my life right now. The important thing is to be healthy, no matter what we choose to eat. Small steps.
I still have not had any meat since Friday, but I am beginning to feel lightheaded.
Here is what I would like to do.
Drink lots of water!
If I’m going to eat meat, do so sparingly to avoid added antibiotics and hormones in my body. I hate that they do that. My daughter is 6, and has had a figure since she was 3.
Avoid fried foods.
No artificial sweeteners, because they are BAD. No soda, because soda is BAD. No coffee, because it is too acidic, hurts my tummy, and makes my body produce fat to protect itself from the acid. And that really sucks because I do love me some coffee.
Eat organic whenever possible.
Enjoy food.
I’m an unapologetic Omnivore, and yes, I did try going vegetarian once and ended up a closet McDonald’s Hamburger eater (I’ve always HATED MickeyD and other fast food!) at which points my veggie roommates caught me, and relented. They told me to get my own frypan and try to hold off on cooking that stuff until they weren’t around.
However, being green, I do very much limit my meat intake (two meals a week) and I buy my meats from local farmers. All raised humanely, fed on unsprayed fields, and treated with little or no antibiotics (just when ill.) I also buy my cheeses, yogurt, raw whole milk, butter, and eggs from the same local farm. Except the Italian hard cheeses. They come from a different supplier, also local and also green aware and humane.
Cows are causing gloabl warming!
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,237077,00.html