Ought to be an interesting night
Shows you how much things can change in just two minutes.
I was rushing through dinner because we got into Gunnison much later than I expected, and I still haven’t studied ONE BIT for my Wilderness First Responder recertification class that starts tomorrow morning, and they give you a multiple choice test coming in, and if you don’t score at least 80% you don’t get to take the course, and so I’ve been terribly delinquent for no good reason, and I was going to blog about that and tell you I couldn’t post for long because I have to cram in as much studying as I can tonight, and then I realized in order to blog I needed a cable from the front desk and–
And that’s when it happened.
I swear I was only out of the room for two minutes. TWO MINUTES. But Bear has been acting weird this whole trip–very insecure–and I should have considered that. We took him for a nice long walk tonight in the snow, and he was leaping in big puppyish circles, so excited to be walking on something so cold and strange, and so I guess I thought he would be fine from now on.
So while I don’t normally leave him alone in a hotel room, I thought two minutes wouldn’t be that bad, and so I AM A BIG IDIOT, AND I FULLY ADMIT THAT RIGHT NOW.
When I got back, Bear was eating something. Something white. At first I thought it was snow I had tracked in on my boots, but then I picked up a bit of it and sniffed.
Then ran to the bathroom to confirm.
He had eaten an entire bar of soap. Wrapper and all.
And what could I say? I couldn’t punish him. He doesn’t know you shouldn’t eat soap, and I had abandoned him, and so he probably thought he should start working on his survival skills right away, not knowing I’d be back in two–okay, maybe it was three–minutes.
All I could say was, “Not cool, Bear.” He doesn’t know that command yet. We’ll have to work on it.
So now we’ve taken the precaution of having shoes and coat ready by the door, because at some point during the night those bubbles are going to hit his digestive tract, and the you-know-what is going to fly.
Folks, please don’t try this at home or on your next vacation.
And I know it’s all payback because I didn’t study ahead of time. My own self-inflicted karma.
Got to go study now. Starting with the chapter on managing explosive diarrhea.
[A.M. Update: "Mr. Bubbles," as my husband is calling him, made it through the night with bowels intact. Now that's a success story.
And I fell asleep while studying, so only know half the material, which gets me through fractures, dislocations, and open festering wounds, but doesn't help me with issues such as High Altitude Pulmonary Edema and severe burns.
So what am I talking to you for? I have one hour left and I need to hit the books.]
Technorati Tags: Wilderness First Responder, Dogs, Dog Ate Soap, I Was Only Gone Two/Three Minutes
March 2nd, 2007 at 9:03 pm
I am so sorry, Robin. Poor Bear.
I feel so awful for my pets when they get into something they shouldn’t have. It’s aggravating to deal with at times, but bless their hearts, they’re not human. Just big, furry babies.
My beagle eats non-toxic crayons, so my yard is littered with rainbow poop. And my cat will drink toilet water if the lid is up.
March 2nd, 2007 at 9:40 pm
Heather, glad I’m not the only one who feels that way. I read a dog training book right before we got Bear that kept emphasizing that, “No, that wasn’t the dog’s mistake, that was your mistake.” I really got that. I figure if shoes were ever destroyed while Bear was a puppy, it was my own fault for leaving them out.
“Rainbow Poop” sounds like a great title. Hope you’ll use it sometime.
March 3rd, 2007 at 7:16 am
Oh geez, poor baby!
It is truly amazing what an animal can accomplish in a few minutes.
Briggsy the cat has been playing Star Trek games– going where no cat has gone before. Which means all those shelves that are fully 6 feet above the floor have had to be stripped of all the beautiful vintage art pottery and art glass, which is all now in a glass front china cupboard that needs an opposable thumb to be opened, so is (hopefully) safe. His new favorite perch is the top of the top kitchen cupboards. The newest game is, when I’m cooking or putting things away, to run across the top of the cupboards to where the open door is and try to climb in.
My friend, Jerry, has a $2,000 golf ball enshrined in his living room. It’s a weird green color. Why is it a $2,000 golf ball? That’s how much it cost to get it out of his Weim’s blocked intestine.
I really don’t understand how people who don’t have animals put up with all that boredom. It is NEVER boring when you have furry companions.
March 3rd, 2007 at 8:56 am
Oooh - I’m glad you three made it through the night! I do hope Bear’s none the worse for wear from the accidental “internal cleansing”. Poor boy….
March 3rd, 2007 at 5:13 pm
I wouldn’t be surprised to find that as a new Hollywood Spa for Pets treatment.
It cleanses the toxins…
March 3rd, 2007 at 8:04 pm
BJ, love the golf ball story. What a fun guy Jerry is.
Vc and Patrick, I like your spin on this. “Internal cleansing,” “spa treatment”–you may be on to something.
March 5th, 2007 at 2:59 pm
this is when it is an advantage to have a truly complaisant, lazy, not-so-bright kind of dog. which ironically i have. he is such a sweet nummbskull he has never figured out where people food comes from, allowing you to leave a jumbo carne asada burro on the coffee table while you answer the phone in the next room with him sitting there patiently awaiting your return.
in contrast, my old dog was a true wilderness survivor–nothing was safe. he spent hours plotting his food related moves (actually he didn’t have that much else going on, so it wasn’t a big sacrifice). his favorite thing in the whole world?–chocolate. no kidding, i know its supposed to be poisonous to dogs, but not this trash hound. his personal best was one valentine’s day. i got home from work to discover that he had eaten three (that’s right, three) of the giant hershey kisses (put out of reach at my instruction on the shelves above the kid’s dressers) and an entire box of godiva off the kitchen countertop. i left him in the backyard overnight, assuming that if he died it would be a fairly messy affair. he was fine, although he pooped foil wrappers for the better part of a week.
March 5th, 2007 at 6:31 pm
If you really loved that dog, you would have saved those wrappers and made a Christmas ornament out of them.
March 5th, 2007 at 9:05 pm
Annette, that’s kinda like my horse who loves beer…. no, it’s NOT good for horse digestions, but when it’s hot and he’s begging (really, he’s just another spotted dog, just a bigger one than our Brit….)
The vet says a few slurps won’t hurt him. Must be true, he’s 17 this month…. still going strong…. if only 2 years old mentally….
March 5th, 2007 at 10:15 pm
and how is Bear, Robin, a couple days on? Okay, I hope!
March 6th, 2007 at 7:34 am
Vc, how sweet of you to ask! Bear is back to what passes for normal for him.
March 6th, 2007 at 8:55 am
vc, i love that. remember the scene in “cat ballou”?
March 6th, 2007 at 12:12 pm
Robin, I’m SO glad! But…. “what passes for normal…?” Or shouldn’t one inquire?
Annette, oh do I ever! In fact, that’s one of my fav movies, my vhs version is SO old it won’t really work right, and I keep forgetting to look for it on dvd!