Fiction author Robin Brande talks about writing, reading, and other vital matters

A few years ago I read an interview with Tina Fey (Saturday Night Live) in which she talked about all the good things that have come to her as a result of saying yes. Here’s the interview so you can enjoy the whole thing.

Her motto? “The fun is always on the other side of a yes.” She talks about all of the wonderful, unexpected opportunities that have come to her simply because she was willing to go for it, rather than listen to all the reasons why not.

I’ve been experimenting with that myself lately. I’m in the happy position of now having a publisher to back me up. I have the feeling that will give me access–to people, to stories, to opportunities–that I didn’t have before. And I intend to go for it. I lived a quiet, scared, sheltered life for a lot of years, and there’s a lot to make up for. Which is why I’ll be going to New York next week to meet my editor at Knopf, Michelle Frey, because how many times in life do you get to meet your editor for the first time? (I’ve already done the math–it’s once.)

I was listening to an interview on NPR yesterday about the future of books in the face of so much competing entertainment. The interviewee made the point that one of the great things for writers these days is that we have so many different venues for expression: we can write novels, we can blog, we can do podcasts and videos and whatnot. So rather than be intimidated by technology, we can embrace it and keep on writing all the livelong day. We don’t have to wait until our books come out to connect with readers.

It’s something to ponder as this new issue of digital publishing gets knocked about. Is digital publishing–having our books on-line as opposed to in people’s laps–a threat, or an opportunity? Read today’s New York Times article for a good look at what it all means. Sooner or later writers will have to decide whether the fun lies on the other side of yes on this one.

On the flip side of this whole “yes” business, there’s Anne Lamott’s line in her wonderful essay “Untitled,” part of her current collection Plan B:

“I live by the truth that ‘No’ is a complete sentence.” She uses that “no,” in part, to avoid social engagements when she knows she’d be better off staying home and hunkering down, or doing something else she truly loves.

Exactly.

That line came to mind last night as I enjoyed a rare dinner with my friend Suzi and her husband. It’s been hard to schedule because we’re all too busy. There just doesn’t seem to be enough time to nurture every relationship, no matter how much we want to. That’s just how it is.

It’s why I can understand my friend Annette’s line to a waiter who was being far too chummy: “Look, I already have enough friends.” I sometimes feel that way–like maybe I’ve reached my limit, since the friends I already have get too little from me anyway. Which is why Anne Lamott’s line makes sense–if you don’t say “no” often enough to activities that don’t really matter, you’re crowding out the people who need what little time you have.

On the other hand, you don’t want to miss the fun on the other side of a “yes” to a new friendship.

So which philosophy do you think works better–saying “yes” more often, or “no”?

Technorati Tags: Writing, Publishing, Digital Publishing, Tina Fey, Anne Lamott

Posted on Monday, June 5th, 2006 at 10:26 am under Life, Writing . Subscribe to responses: RSS 2.0 Comment Feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.