Will you take the advice if it’s boring?
My friend Barry, who is also a writer–check out his upcoming novel The Astonishing Adventures of Fanboy and Goth Girl–and I have been talking about this phenomenon we’ve both noticed a lot lately. Over the years–and especially now that his book is about to come out and mine is finally in the works–friends and acquaintances who have “always wanted to write” ask for our advice about how to get started.
And I can’t help but notice the contrast. If someone asked me how I became a lawyer, I’d lay out the steps: go to college, go to law school, spend the summers clerking, take the Bar exam, pass it, be on your way.
But it’s boring to think there are steps to becoming a writer. A lot of people have this fantasy about sitting alone in a room–always in the winter, always without heat–and writing furiously as the ideas flood our brains. Or maybe after seeing Capote it seems you have to have a glass of something brown over ice right next to you at all times, and you’re drunk and you’re smoking, and by God, you’re brilliant. People will have to put up with all your eratic behavior because that’s how geniuses are, that’s how artists are, etc.
What if the truth instead is that you get up in the morning and simmer your oatmeal, you read the comics first to soften you up for the hard news, you walk your dogs, you put in a load of laundry, then you go fire up the computer and start your day? And you sit at the computer for 4 hours some days, 14 hours others, and you just keep going, telling yourself stories or writing articles or whatever your particular passion is, and you take breaks to eat and move the laundry to the dryer, and eventually you have to interact with people–maybe make dinner, eat it with someone, talk to a friend on the phone–and then you might write some more, or read a book by someone who writes better than you do and can therefore teach you, and finally it’s late enough that you shouldn’t be up any longer because early the next morning the whole cycle starts again–what if that’s what it’s really like? Is that too boring?
And what if the truth is that to get to that point where you’re comfortable sitting and writing all day, you first had to go to some workshops to learn your craft, and you had to practice writing every day so you’d learn how you sound on paper once you strip away all the fakery and get down to the real you, and you read writing magazines and writing books, and do all the other things that go into the apprenticeship of writing, just as if you were going to law school for three years? I’m not saying it would take three years, but what if it did? Is that too long?
I know people don’t want to hear these things, because I see it. I see the way their expressions change. One second they’re all eager, ready to hear that it happens in a flash–suddenly you get this brilliant idea and you scribble it down and someone discovers you and you’re off–cocktail parties and book signings for all–and then here you are droning on about reading and writing and ‘rithmatic. BORING. I see the film drop over their eyes.
But I have faith. In the same way that I paid attention when someone else told me how it’s really done–not the fantasy, but the reality–I have faith that someone else out there would like to hear the same information and is ready to act on it. I know for a fact–because I’ve seen it happen to me and to others–that if you do these things, you will succeed as a writer. It’s boring to talk about patience and persistence, so if you’re not interested, then don’t read it. But for all you who think you might be willing to hear the truth–and would even be excited to hear it–then please read on.
And just a reminder before you do: There are lots of writers out there giving advice, and I’m just one of them. Have enough respect for yourself and your career to let yourself be fully informed. If something I say sounds right for you, great. If not, keep searching for other teachers. We all have our own talents, our own methods, our own careers. It’s more fun that way, isn’t it?
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